The Return of Andy "Gandhi"

After slumming it at university in York for the last few months, Andy “Gandhi” returned to the court for our pre-christmas session. He certainly hadn’t lost his knack for bike polo and soon got into the swing of things and scored two well composed goals in the first game. He soon got back into his old ways though and very quickly took Nick “The Shouty One” off his bike with a mallard right through his bottom bracket. Some excellent passing moves and great goals saw Andy come 3rd on the day just outdone for 2nd by Kol on goal difference. He was also the top scorer on the day knocking in 11 fantastic goals. Well done Andy it was great to have you back on the court.

Kol “The Statsman” seemed to develop a shooting stutter on the day. A static ball inches from the goal line and no-one else around. How could he miss. Flapping around like a one winged duck he made at least 6 attempts to hit the ball before it was cleared by a defender.  A very embarrassing situation for "The Statsman". Unfortunately his embarrassment continued as he did exactly the same at the other end of the court later in the session. He was even further embarrassed when “Young Jack” tried to ram his handlebars up his bum but that’s another story.

Today sees the last session of 2014 and despite the “End of the World” reports of snow it looks like we are going to have a sunny but chilly session.  Who’s going to have a “cracker” of a day and who will get “stuffed”.

BRING ON THE POLO!

"Mix It Up" Sunday 21st December 2014

What a great day. Well done to Nick on his first win of the season and it was good to see Andy Gandhi back in the saddle.

The Results

The Goal Scorers

The Games

Merry Christmas

It's the last Sunday before Christmas so come on down and LET'S PLAY POLO! Cheeriness and Good Spirits required... Christmas jumpers are optional. Welly Lane hardcourt 2pm. Everyone welcome.

A “Ball Breaking” Good Time

Last week saw just four players battling for supremacy on the court. This meant several fast and furious “twosies” and a lot of silliness. It was a good day for practicing our passing moves and getting a bit of target practice in although Dean “Double Dean” Dent seemed more content with spinning 360’s. Soon the skilful passing moves turned into everyone hitting the ball as hard as they could. This continued until eventually we broke the ball.

Don’t worry we have new “cool” balls arriving soon courtesy of “The Shouty One” at East Coast Bicycles. They are “cool” in the sense that they function best between 0 and 20 degrees but they are green which is possibly slightly less "cool" than fluorescent pink.

Let’s hope for more players this week. BRING ON THE POLO!

"Mix It Up" Sunday 7th December 2014

Only four of us but a cracking session

The Results

The Goal Scorers

The Games

Acute Goals, No Goals & Own Goals

Last week saw a lot of very impressive goals. Will ”Crappy Foot” soon set the standard and showed a lot of composure as on two occasions he calmly slipped the ball into the back of the goal from a very acute angle. Excellent goals Will. Well Done!

Will was on a roll and he soon turned his hand to goal spotting. A cracking shot by “The Shouty One” saw the ball scream towards the goal. It was such a high paced shot that it was difficult to see if it had gone in. Nick was confident and none of the other players disagreed but Will called a No Goal (How Rude) stating that the ball was over the bar. The crowd went silent (well the kids stopped screaming for a moment). A controversial decision indeed. Maybe its time we got some goal line technology or maybe just some nets.

Kol managed to score the most impressive own goal ever in Hull Bicycle Polo’s history. A super powerful shot from the half way line saw the ball blocked on the goal line by Nick’s front wheel. Unfortunately for Kol he had hit the ball so hard that it went flying past everyone and back down the other end of the court and straight his own goal. Even Dean “Double Dean” Dent in super fast mode couldn’t catch the ball.

Kol did partially redeem himself later with the goal of the day. A perfectly weighted cross from “Double Dean” to the centre of the court followed by a first time strike from Kol saw the ball fly into the back of the net. A great goal but everyone will remember the day for Kol’s own goal.

In other news; PC Paul on returning to “Bag Corner” after a game managed to fall off his bike. ??? Mr Roger’s chain snapped and he had to play the last game on Double Dean’s bike. “The only Fixed Wheel bike in the village”. Young Jack “The River Horse” had a mood swing and went from overly giggly at the start of the session to extremely grumpy at the end. 

Once again it was another great session. Well done everyone.

IT’S SUNDAY.....LET’S PLAY POLO

"Mix It Up" Sunday 30th November 2014

What a cracking day! Well done everyone.

The Results

The Goal Scorers

The Games

Thrills, Spills and Knife Fights

The gloomy grey day kept the players at bay on Sunday. With only Kol ‘the statsman’ and dean ‘double dean’ leaving from the shop it almost ended up in a one on one. Young jack had caught some kind of river horse Ebola and Will decided he’d like to shout at someone called Louise Hamilton through his telly box. Christmas shopping or warmth probably got the others.

When the two lonely players arrived they were greeted with a shopping trolley on court. One to go on the list alongside shed, human poo, animal poo, vodka bottles and PC Paul’s private vhs collection from weeks past.

Speaking of which, PC Paul and Mr roger did finally turn up and apologised for their tardiness. With the numbers being low Mr roger proposed a knife fight to keep us warm. No really! This thankfully involved ingeniously utilising discarded beer cans and made for a very skilful game indeed rather than actual knives.

Oh we also played some proper real polo. Mr Roger won because he had more points than the others. And Mr Roger had most goals because he scored more goals than the others. Its the aim of the game really.

Its Sunday, lets polo!

(This weeks Mallard was written by Dean "Double Dean" Dent)

"Mix It Up" Sunday 23rd November 2014

Only a few of us but a great session as always.

The Results

The Goal Scorers

The Games

TIME OUT.....AGAIN????

Some say that if you cut a worm in half you get two worms. I never really believed that and I have learnt from experience that all you end up with is a dead worm in two pieces. The same goes for Paul “Worm’s” shinny new bicycle. A great looking piece of kit indeed. 

Unfortunately it soon became apparent that something was not quite right and almost immediately in the first game his chain came off. This became a recurring theme throughout the afternoon with his chain slipping off during most of the matches.

Young Jack tried to distract us from the multiple chain incidents with a flat tyre but this was soon overshadowed by the “Worm”.  HIS PEDAL FELL OFF!!!! Not only did it fall of but there wasn’t any thread left on the crank. We thought that this was the end of the day for the “Worm’s” bike but being a resourceful man he soon returned to the court with his pedal replaced with a rusty old bolt and carried on. (I’m sure this wouldn’t have passed tournament regulations). After that Paul “Worm” hung around the goal a lot.

Well after a day of more time-outs than an American football match and the court getting dark as we tried to squeeze in the last few games we realised that we had actually played some polo and there was a winner. Somehow Kol “The Statsman” managed to recover from his previous week’s poor performance and came out on top. Nick just beat Mr Roger to second place on goal difference and PC Paul and Young Jack also could only be separated  by goal difference  with PC Paul coming out on top and taking 4th spot. Understandably the “Worm” and his collection of bicycle parts finished last.

Despite all the stoppages and delays it was another very enjoyable session. Well done everyone.